

We are taught to think that enjoying sex is different for men compared to women and different in hetero or homosexual relationships.

Whereas for men, or masculine people sharing emotions and vulnerability or seeking love is wrongly judged as being a sign of weakness. For example, in many cultures for women to know what they like and dislike about sex and share it with their partner is wrongly considered inappropriate. This has a lot to do with a lot of things like our upbringing, our individual experiences, and how social norms have influenced how we view sex. When it comes to sex and how you like to have it, being kind and loving yourself can be complicated. So how do we ensure that in a sexual relationship, we care for ourselves and for others? The Love Yourself Pleasure Principle brings together the issues of loving yourself and being kind to others with sexual pleasure. People want to have sex and want to enjoy sex for many different reasons and in different ways.

It is about allowing yourself to learn what your body likes in the form of solo sex or masturbation, partnered sex and what thoughts give you pleasure.

So, understanding what you enjoy and what gives you pleasure is understanding your own desires and needs, and those of your partners. Sexual pleasure is ‘ the physical and/or psychological satisfaction and enjoyment derived from shared or solitary erotic experiences, including thoughts, fantasies, dreams, emotions, and feelings.’. It can mean understanding your preferences, preferred gender, and sexual identity and what gives you pleasure. Understanding all the dimensions of what you like also means you know what you don’t want. There are three dimensions to this Pleasure Principle we want to explore here loving yourself, loving and being kind to others and loving our planet.įirstly, loving yourself is asking yourself and then understanding what you want, how you want to express your sexuality.
